Head Above Water Read online

  “If your mom has information about Axel’s criminal past, maybe we can use that to get the police involved.”

  “I thought of that too, but since my mom paid the debt she’d be an accessory.” I shake my head. “We can’t do that.”

  “I didn’t think of that.”

  I did, because I’ve thought of everything. Thinking is all I’ve done since Axel came back. However, it’s gotten me nowhere. I’m still at square one. And even though I’ve assured Harper that Axel won’t come here, I know Axel. At some point he’s going to get impatient. And when he does, all bets are off.

  That’s why I’ve got to take matters into my own hands.

  Harper goes to bed at around ten o’clock. I hold her in my arms until she’s fast asleep. It’s painful to unfasten my arms from her and climb out of the bed. I want nothing more than to keep holding her. Lying with her nestled against me is becoming my new favorite thing in the whole world. But it’s a luxury I can’t afford right now. I’ve got to end this whole thing with Axel.

  And I have to do it tonight.

  All day I tried to come up with a plan. And then it hit me. I still know how to get ahold of Axel’s old friends. They were my friends once too. And if I can find him, we can resolve this whole thing and he can return to wherever he came from.

  Harper’s right. Ginny’s death isn’t my fault. I wish I could make Axel see that. But I’m not naïve enough to think that will happen. So if Axel needs to beat the shit out of me to feel better about the situation, so be it. I’ll endure it to keep Harper safe.

  I just hope he doesn’t kill me.

  My stomach lurches as I glance down at Harper sleeping soundly in my bed. Her hair fans out around her face like a halo. She looks like an angel. My angel.

  Axel won’t kill me. We have too much history. At least that’s what I’m going to keep telling myself. I’ll say the words over and over in my head like a mantra. Anything to keep my feet moving forward, to help me go through with this. It’s the only way to keep the woman I love safe.

  I slip out of the bedroom, closing the door softly behind me. Then I hurry down the hallway and out into the cool night. My tennis shoes clomp on the pavement as I walk to my car. Once inside, I pull out my cell phone and scroll through the contacts. After Ginny died I meant to clean up my contact list, get rid of the guys with insect names, but I never got around to it. That’s why Spider is still in here.

  Spider is what everyone calls him. Now that I think about it I’m not sure what his actual name is. It’s probably something benign like Ron. Although I guess Spider isn’t much better. And it’s not like he got the name for having Spidey sense like Spiderman or anything cool like that. No, it’s because his arms and legs are skinny and lanky, disproportionate to his round middle. He seriously looks like a spider. I shiver thinking about it. But back in the day he was Axel’s best friend. I’m sure they’ve been in touch.

  With shaky fingers I push on his name and then press the phone to my ear. When he answers, I sit up straighter and try to sound braver than I feel. “Hey, Spider. It’s Tag.”

  “Tag, it’s been a long time.”

  “Yeah, it has.”

  “When was the last time exactly?”

  My skin crawls.

  “It must have been before Ginny died,” he continues.

  “Yeah. Well, it was a tough time for all of us. And I um…you know…I’ve been busy.” I never liked Spider, or any of Ginny’s friends for that matter. I only tolerated them.

  “You can cut the bullshit. I know why you’re calling,” Spider says in his gravelly voice. “I’m guessing you’re looking for Axel.”

  I swallow hard, my palms slick. Clearly I was right in calling Spider. “You know where he is?”

  “Yeah, but I don’t think you want to see him. He wants your head on a platter, man. Not that I blame him after what you did to his sister. I’d have gotten to you already if it were mine.”

  “What happened with Ginny wasn’t my fault. I need to get Axel to see that.”

  “Good luck.” Spider lets out a humorless laugh.

  “Look, I need to find Axel. Can you tell me where he is?”

  “If I were you I wouldn’t go after him.”

  “Thanks for the warning, but I don’t have a choice. I need to find him. Do you know where he is or not?” My patience is wearing thin. I glance back at the house, knowing Harper is still curled up in my bed. I’d be there too if it wasn’t for Axel trying to screw with my life. I want this done.

  “Yeah, I know where he is. He’s staying with a friend in Chula Vista.”

  I sit up, reaching into my glove compartment for a pen. “Do you know the address?”

  He rattles it off, and I scribble it on my hand. “I know exactly where that is. Thanks, man. I owe you.” I click off and toss the phone onto the passenger seat. Sticking the key in the ignition, I start the car and flick on the lights. Yellow illuminates a path in front of me. I pull away from the curb and start driving toward my old stomping grounds. Funny that Axel is staying with someone mere blocks away from where I grew up. I wonder if it’s someone I know. Nah, I doubt I ever ran in the same circle as one of Axel’s friends. Sometimes I find it funny that I ever got mixed up with Ginny and Axel. It almost feels like that guy who hung with them was someone completely different. I met Ginny at a time where I was at my lowest and most vulnerable, and she seemed to get the pain I was in. We’d both lost parents. All of my other friends couldn’t empathize at all. Most of them had only lost a distant relative or grandparent. The loss and emptiness I felt after my dad died was something they couldn’t relate to at all. But Ginny could, and so could Axel. I thought that I needed them, and I knew they needed me. It felt like the perfect fit.

  Only it wasn’t.

  When I met Harper I finally experienced what a real connection was. I thought I connected with Ginny, but I hadn’t. That was forced and superficial. Besides, Ginny was too broken to really connect with anyone. Harper’s different. She’s endured pain, but she still remains soft and open in her own way. There’s still room for me to fit in her life; in her heart.

  As I drive further away from my house I’m glad to know that Harper is safe and protected for now. And I plan to keep her that way.

  The dark night sky swallows me, and weariness settles over me like a thick blanket. I crank up the radio and find a loud rock station. The drumbeat and screeching guitar should keep me awake and alert. With each mile my apprehension grows. I mean, I really have no idea what will happen when I find Axel. Hell, I don’t even know what friends he’s with. Or what they’re capable of. I may be driving to my death.

  I swallow hard and grip the wheel so tight my knuckles whiten. Is this a good idea? Am I naïve to think I can fix this? That I’ll make it out alive?

  Then again, what other choice do I have? I can’t stay locked in my house forever, and I can’t sit and wait for him to make a move against me or Harper. No, this is the only way. No matter what the consequence is, I have no other option.

  The ringing of my phone startles me and I jerk the wheel. After righting it, I snatch the phone up. When my gaze connects with the screen, my insides tighten.

  Harper must’ve woken up and noticed I was gone. Shit. For one second I contemplate not answering, but I know I can’t do that. She’d flip out. It would make her more worried than she probably already is.

  Sighing, I put the phone to my ear. “Harper?”

  “Oh, Tag. Thank God. I was so worried. I woke up and you were gone. So I ran around the house looking for you. Then I went outside and saw that your car is gone, and I totally panicked.”

  My heart stutters. “You’re outside?”

  “Yeah.”

  “No. Stay inside where it’s safe.”

  “Relax. I’m going back in right now. Where are-”

  “Harper?”

  I hear a scuffle, a crack. She must’ve dropped the phone. What the hell is going on? She screams and my blood runs co
ld.

  “Harper!” I yell.

  In the distance I hear a male’s voice and then her phone goes dead. Oh, no. No, no, no. I slam on my brakes and smash my fist into the steering wheel. I walked right into Axel’s trap. God, I’m such an idiot. He never wanted me.

  Harper is the one he was after all along.

  27

  HARPER

  I STIR IN the bed, feeling cold. Glancing down, I see that the covers are bunched at my feet. Reaching down, I pull them up to my chin. Feeling content, I roll toward Tag wanting nothing more than to cuddle against him. The last two nights I’ve slept better than ever. Which I know is odd, since I’ve got some crazy guy after me. But I feel so safe in Tag’s arms. Safer than ever.

  My breath hitches in my throat. Where’s Tag? I run my palm over his side of the bed, and then listen for sounds of movement in the hall. Maybe he went to the bathroom or to get a drink of water. Silence. A shiver runs down my spine.

  Tossing the covers off, I jump out of bed. In my bare feet I pad out of the room and down the hallway. The house is dark with no movement or sound. I peek into the family room, the kitchen, the bathroom. All empty. My heart starts to pound. Where is he?

  I scurry down the hall and back into Tag’s room. With a trembling hand, I snatch my cell phone off the dresser and dial Tag’s number. Please let him be okay. Please let him be okay. I repeat the words over and over in my head as the phone rings and rings. Terror creeps over my skin with each ring until I feel like I’m going to lose it. I tear down the hallway and out the front door. My stomach rolls when I see that his car is gone.

  “Harper?” Tag’s voice speaks in my ear.

  I exhale, gripping the phone tight. “Oh, Tag. Thank God. I was so worried. I woke up and you were gone. So I ran around the house looking for you. Then I went outside and saw that your car is gone, and I totally panicked.”

  “You’re outside?” His concerned tone startles me.

  “Yeah.”

  “No. Stay inside where it’s safe.”

  I turn around, loving how protective he is of me. Reaching for the doorknob, I say, “Relax. I’m going back in right now. Where are-” The phone drops from my hand as if it was swatted away. What the hell? An arm comes around my neck, pulling on me forcefully. I scream and start to flail and kick.

  “Calm down.” A gloved hand covers my mouth.

  I freeze, recognizing the voice. Dammit, it’s Axel. Why is he wearing gloves? All of the information I’ve gleaned from watching TV crime dramas plays out in my mind. Oh, hell. What is he planning to do that he doesn’t want to leave fingerprints as evidence.

  “This will go much easier for you if you cooperate,” he says.

  Hell, no. How stupid do I look? I writhe in his grip, trying with all my might to elbow him or kick him. I connect a couple of times, but he doesn’t seem fazed. Again I wish I’d paid more attention at that self-defense class. My body is being dragged across the lawn, my bare toes skimming the wet grass. I dig my heels in, trying to cause friction. But all it succeeds in doing is severely bruising the bottom of my feet. Grass and dirt cover them. I try to open my mouth to bite his hand, but I can’t get it to work. He’s holding his hand on too tightly. In fact, I’m starting to have trouble breathing. It reminds me of drowning. A bud of panic takes root in my stomach, but I fight it down. I need to stay calm if I have any hope of getting out of this.

  “That’s it. That’s my girl. Easy does it.”

  Clearly Axel has taken my calmness to mean that I’ve given up. Maybe that’s my upper-hand. Make him think I’m letting him win and then strike. I have to be patient. He opens the trunk of his car, and I shake my head. No way am I going in there. I won’t survive. I’m too claustrophobic.

  He tries to pick me up, but I finally remember a self-defense move. I shove my head back as hard as I can. I hear the crack of his nose as I hit it with the back of my head. It doesn’t feel too good on my end either. His hands release me, and without a moment’s hesitation I start running.

  I get a few houses down when I hear footsteps nearing me. Shit. I cut across the neighbor’s lawn and hightail toward their back fence. When I reach the fence arms come around me, tackling me to the ground. My head hits the side of the fence, and spots fill my vision. Still I’m not giving up without a fight. I kick at Axel and claw at the ground to pull me forward.

  “You sure are making this fun for me,” Axel says in a way that makes my skin crawl. He flings me over and straddles me.

  I look down at Tag’s boxers and t-shirt that I’m wearing. I don’t even have on a bra, and I can tell Axel notices by his smug smile. It makes me want to punch him in his ugly face. Only I can’t. He’s got my arms pinned down. I jerk around with all my might.

  “Yeah, babe, keep doing that.”

  “Go to hell!”

  “Oh, I will. But not today.” He raises his arm. Before I can dodge him, his first connects with my face, and I black out.

  My head throbs, and my face hurts. As I try to pry open my eyes I have to squint through the pain. Reaching my hand up, I touch my cheek. It’s swollen and tender. When I pull my hand back, warm blood coats my fingertips. God, he got me good. I cringe thinking about what I must look like. My body rocks back and forth, and my teeth chatter. Why am I so cold? And why do I feel like I’m moving? Forcing my eyes all the way open, I stare up at the night sky – the smattering of twinkling stars and the bright moon. What am I lying on? The breeze hits me and I wince at the familiar smell. Oh, please no. Turning my head, I glance around, my insides twisting.

  I’m in a small fishing boat. I stare out trying to locate the beach, but it’s so dark I have a hard time making it out. But we’re not near the shore. That much I can see. Fear chokes me, and I claw at my throat.

  “Lookie who finally decided to join the party.” Axel bends down next to me. His shoulder-length black straggly hair hangs down over his dark eyes. There is a scar that runs the length of his cheek, and I wonder how he got it. He’s gaunt and lanky, and his face is sunken in. It’s like he’s such a skeleton with skin on. Clearly he’s a tweaker.

  I grit my teeth, biting back angry words. I’m in no position to fight him now. If I go overboard, I’m dead. Suddenly I wish more than anything that Tag and I had finished my lessons. All I can do is float. How the hell is that going to help me now?

  He’s hovering over me, so I struggle to sit up. I don’t want him on top of me again. Repulsion fills me at the thought. I’d take a punch to the face over that any day. The only guy I want touching me is Tag. Tag. Where are you? Hot tears threaten to penetrate as I think about the man I love. I would give anything to be safe in his arms right now. Where did he go tonight? Why did he leave?

  “What do you want with me?” I hate how whiny and scared my voice sounds.

  “Don’t be scared.” Axel runs a finger across my chin. A little dried blood rings his nose and a bruise is starting to form around it and under his eyes. It brings me slight satisfaction to know that I at least maimed him. “I was hoping we could enjoy an evening together out on the ocean. Maybe even go for a little swim.”

  My heart clatters against my rib cage in response to his knowing smile. Tag’s words float through my mind. He showed up after you left…

  He saw Tag teaching me to swim. His sister drowned. And now he’s going to get revenge. I slink back in the boat, my butt hitting the side. I tuck my legs up to my chest and hug them close. But it doesn’t dispel my nerves. What am I going to do?

  “You know my sister liked to swim,” Axel says, eyeing me from where he sits in the center of the boat. It rocks lazily back and forth, and I’m starting to feel queasy.

  Maybe if I can keep him talking we can glide back to shore. “Tell me about her.”

  Axel looks at me funny. “Why?”

  I shrug. “It’s clear that you loved her a lot. I thought you might want to talk about her. I know that after my sister died it helped to talk about her.”

  “Do you know wh
o you’re screwing with? This isn’t a joke.”

  I shake my head vehemently. “No. I’m serious. I had a twin sister. She died when I was six.” Rubbing my hands over my arms, I shiver. “I would never joke about this. It was the worst thing that ever happened to me.”

  “How’d she die?” His voice is softer than earlier, but I still detect wariness. I’m not ready to let down my guard.

  I swallow hard, and contemplate lying. Will he even believe me if I tell him how? It does seem like a huge coincidence. Then again, I’m a terrible liar. He might sense that I’m doing it and then I’ll be worse off. “Drowned.”

  His head reels back as if I’ve slapped him. “No way. You’re shitting me.”

  “I wish I was.” I clasp my hands in my lap.

  “I’m sure Tag told you what happened to Ginny.”

  “It wasn’t Tag’s fault. He never wanted anything bad to happen to her,” I say in a rush of words.

  “Spare me the sob story!” His tone is harsh, and I shrink back. “I know what happened, and I know who’s to blame.”

  “I’m sorry,” I mumble, unclasping my hands and staring at my open palms. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I do feel really bad about what happened to your sister. I know how awful that is.”

  He doesn’t respond, and fear nags at me. I glance up at him. He’s staring at me with an awed expression as if he has no idea what to make of me. Waves lap against the side of the boat and darkness surrounds us. This is a situation I never thought I’d be in. In the corner of my eye I see a flash of light and turn toward it. My heart leaps in my chest. The shore. I can see the shore. We’re not as far as I thought.

  “Ah, I see what you’re doing,” Axel drawls. “You almost had me. You’re good.”

  “What are you talking about?” This guy is definitely paranoid. Paranoid and out for revenge is not a good combination.

  “I thought we were having a bonding moment or some shit like that, but you’re trying to get me to let you go.”