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“Yeah, she’s walking right behind them.”

  Haley bit her lip. “There’s no girl behind them.”

  “Yeah, she’s right-” The girl had vanished. Huh. Where had she gone?

  “You sure you’re okay?” Haley placed a hand on my arm.

  “Yeah.” I forced a smile. Only I wasn’t sure at all. A funny feeling descended in the pit of my stomach. Something weird was going on.

  Chapter Seven

  Dialing Grandma’s number, I stretched my legs out on the couch. They were warm inside my sweatpants and my feet were encased in fuzzy slipper socks. Rain splattered the window and the wind whistled through the trees. I was glad to be inside where it was warm. It was Sunday night and Mom was out with Carol, hoping to meet a new guy. I just hoped she met a human one this time.

  Grandma was out of breath when she answered.

  “What are you doing?” I asked. “You sound like you just ran a mile.”

  “Oh, I just walked inside the house.”

  “Where were you?” A branch scratched against the side of the house, startling me.

  “At the Giovanni’s having dinner.”

  My stomach dropped. “Oh.” I picked at a hangnail.

  “Kenzie? Are you alright?”

  “Uh-huh. I’m just so confused right now. Tanner is hanging out with his ex-girlfriend and it’s making me totally jealous. But then you mention Isaac and I miss him so much it hurts. How can I feel this way about two different guys? It doesn’t make sense.”

  “We can’t always control our feelings.”

  “Isn’t that the truth.”

  “Have you prayed about it?”

  Prayer. Huh. I hadn’t even thought about that. Shame washed over me. “No.”

  “Well, I think if I were you I’d start there.”

  I glanced over at my Bible, which sat untouched on the end table. When was the last time I’d picked it up? I couldn’t remember. I’d been so hung up on my own stuff I hadn’t even cracked it open. Just another way I had messed up lately.

  After hanging up with Grandma, I reached for the Bible. Before my fingers touched it, an eerie sound perked my ears. Cold descended on me. Shadows danced in the corner of my vision. Shivering, the hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention. An icy sweat slithered down my back.

  A haunting voice sang outside my window. It sounded like a child. The song was familiar. I honed in on it.

  “Ring around the rosy, a pocket full of posy. Ashes, ashes, we all fall down.”

  Trembling, I stood and made my way to the window. After peering outside, I gasped. In my front yard was the boy from next door. He was jumping rope and singing his song repeatedly.

  “Ring around the rosy, a pocket full of posy.”

  Rain pelted his body and yet he didn’t seem to notice. His eyes were blazing in the darkness. He craned his neck and looked at me, his mouth curving in a crooked smile.

  “Ashes, ashes, we all fall down.”

  I moved away from the window. My heart hammered in my ears. My breath came out in shallow puffs. I covered my ears with my hands in order to block out the song, but still I heard it.

  “Ashes, ashes, we all fall down.”

  That night the strange boy filled my dreams. He chased me through the neighborhood, singing his haunting song. His eyes burned like fire. His teeth were razor sharp like Wesley’s when he transformed into a dragon. The boy was lightening fast and his reflexes were sharp. No matter how hard I ran, he always caught up to me. And even when I found the best hiding place he always found me. A few times I thought I’d lost him but then he’d reappear, a song still on his lips. He’d smile at the sight of me as if he enjoyed our sadistic game.

  I wondered how long I could endure it.

  I wondered if it would ever end.

  When morning finally came, I was still exhausted from my fitful sleep. However, I was grateful that the night was over. I was happy to abandon my bed and leave the nightmare behind. I trudged through my morning rituals, feeling like I moved through water. My head swam and my eyes burned.

  “Are you sick?” Mom asked over breakfast. We sat across from each other at the small table in the middle of the kitchen.

  “No, just tired.” I spooned a bite of sugary cereal into my mouth and forced myself to chew.

  “Me, too.” Mom yawned behind her hand before picking up her coffee mug and taking a sip.

  “Late night, huh?”

  She chuckled as if I’d just told a joke.

  “Did you meet anyone?”

  “Nah, it was just the same old losers.” Reaching her hand up, she patted the hot rollers that covered her head.

  I shoved another spoonful of cereal into my mouth in an attempt to mask how relieved I was by the news.

  After breakfast I brushed my teeth and laced up my boots. The rain had started up again, so I threw on my hooded jacket and hollered goodbye to Mom who was in the bathroom fixing her hair.

  When I stepped outside, I tightened the hood around my face. Rain splattered onto my face and streaked down my clothes. Just when I was about to run toward my car, a splash of red in the green grass caught my attention. On closer examination I saw that it was a white jump rope with red handles. A chill skittered down my spine. I shivered. Stepping into the wet grass, I picked it up and held it between my fingers.

  The door to the house next door swung open and Mrs. Kelley walked outside. She wore a black business suit and held an umbrella over her head. Holding the jump rope in my hand, I raced over to her.

  “Mrs. Kelley!” I shouted to be heard above the thunderous chorus of rain and wind.

  She turned and smiled at me. I got soaked, while she stayed dry under her massive umbrella. I proffered the jump rope.

  “Here. This belongs to the little boy who’s been staying with you.”

  She recoiled as if I’d slapped her. “There’s no boy staying with us.”

  “Oh. Well…it’s just….I saw a little boy with you the other day when you were gardening.”

  Her eyes widened, her face paled. She shook her head. “No. You’re mistaken.” Ducking her head, she hurried off. Her heels tapped on the concrete as she fled down the walkway to her car.

  Fear gripped me as I watched her drive away.

  At lunch later that day I spied Tanner and Scarlet eating together again. I was cranky and tired from my nightmare. Seeing them together angered me. It would have been one thing if he had started dating someone new. Maybe then I could’ve been happy for him and moved on, but not with Scarlet. After everything I knew about how much he’d changed, it didn’t make any sense that he would go back to her and start hanging with that group again.

  Not to mention what that group had done to Haley and me. Had he so quickly forgotten how Derek left Haley for Chelsea? And how Caleb had forced himself on me? And how Ian and Caleb had almost killed Haley?

  It made no sense. So after school when I spotted Tanner in the parking lot I raced to catch up to him. He was completely surprised when I started calling his name. Not that I blamed him. I was kind of surprised myself.

  He turned to me and raised his brows in a question, but said nothing. It still tore me apart to see him so hardened and mean.

  Before I could lose my nerve, I forged on. “So, are you back with Scarlet or what?”

  “Why do you care?”

  “Come on. Stop acting like this.”

  A group of guys walked past and threw us a curious look.

  “You know I care about you, Tanner.”

  “Really? Do I?” He cocked his head to the side. “Cause you didn’t seem like that when your boyfriend showed up.”

  “Tanner, I’m sorry. I really am.” I stepped toward him, reached out my hand.

  He backed away and held his arms up with his palms out, as if he was involved in a stick-up. “Don’t.”

  Stinging from the rejection, I bit my lip and stayed still. “I am sorry, Tanner. I didn’t want to hurt you. But you made me choose.”

&nbs
p; A look of disgust crossed his face. “You’re blaming me now?”

  I shook my head. “No. I’m just trying to make you understand that I’m sorry. It’s killing me that things are so awkward between us.”

  “It’s not so great for me either.” A trace of the old Tanner peeked out.

  I took my opening. “I miss you.”

  The hardness returned. “I know what you’re doing. You can’t have him so now you want me again. Well, it doesn’t work like that.”

  I felt like he’d punched me in the gut and knocked the wind out of me. It left me gasping for air. “Tanner, that’s not what I’m doing.”

  “You had your chance, Kenzie, and you blew it. You’re not calling the shots anymore.” He turned his back on me. An engine roared to life. A car skidded past.

  I couldn’t let him go just yet. “She’s not right for you.”

  He slowly faced me again. “Oh, really? Who says?”

  “You can be as angry with me as you want.”

  “I wasn’t really asking your permission.”

  A bus drove by and thick grey smoke clouded my vision.

  “Scarlet’s not good for you. I don’t want you to mess your life up just because of me.”

  He laughed bitterly. “Don’t worry. What I have with Scarlet has nothing to do with you.”

  His words hit their mark. Hurt welled up inside of me, building a wall between us. I threw my shoulders back and held my head high. “Even though we’re not together anymore, Isaac would never say hurtful things like this to me. You were wrong, Tanner. I did make the right choice.” Without giving him the chance to walk out on me again, I spun around and stalked off.

  When I got to my car, my hands shook as I attempted to unlock the door. The keys slipped from my sweaty fingers and fell to the pavement. As I bent to retrieve them, a shadow cast over my shoulder and painted the asphalt in front of me.

  “Kenzie,” a man said. At first I couldn’t place the voice even though it was familiar. When I figured out who it was, I was shocked.

  Chapter Eight

  “Dad? What are you doing here?”

  He wore the same ratty, wrinkled clothes, and his beard was unkempt. A cough erupted from his throat, reeking of smoke.

  “I wanted to talk with you and I knew your mother would never allow it at your house.”

  “So you followed me?” I looked around to make sure we weren’t alone. There were still several students hanging out by their cars, which gave me comfort. I wasn’t sure I was ready to be alone with my dad.

  He chuckled and it came out in a low rasp. “Didn’t need to follow you. I knew where the high school was.”

  Duh. Of course he did. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that out.

  “And when I got here all I had to do was look for the prettiest girl in the school.”

  My cheeks warmed at the compliment. In that moment, the issues with Tanner and Isaac disappeared. The dad I’d longed to know my entire life was here and he thought I was pretty. It seemed too good to be true.

  Staring at my feet, I kicked the toe of my shoe on the ground. “So, why were you looking for me?”

  “I wanted to see you. Isn’t that reason enough?”

  I stared into his eyes to see if I could read anything in them. I couldn’t.

  “But, I mean…well….it’s just that ….my whole life….”

  He took a step forward, and instinctively I backed up, ramming my butt against the car. It stung. I bit down on my tongue.

  “Look, Kenzie, I know what you’re trying to say.”

  “You do?” I wasn’t even sure what I was trying to say.

  “Yeah.” He ran a shaky hand over his disheveled hair. “You have no reason to trust me. I’ve let you down. I haven’t been a dad to you at all. But that’s why I’m here. I’m trying to clean up my life, Kenzie. I’ve been going to AA and attending church.”

  This perked my interest. Could it be that my dad had found God like I had?

  “Really?”

  He nodded. “Yeah, and part of my healing process is to right all my wrongs. Leaving you and your mom is my biggest regret.”

  My heart lifted. If only Mom could hear, then maybe she would see that he was different now. If anyone believed in God’s power to change a person it was me.

  Dad continued, “I just wanted to say I’m sorry.”

  I swallowed hard. A car zoomed by us. Looking around the lot I saw that only a couple of students were left. Only I didn’t feel as nervous about it. My dad may have been a bad guy before, but now he seemed harmless.

  “Kenzie, I know it’s probably asking too much, but do you think you could ever find it in your heart to forgive me?”

  Unable to find my voice, I nodded. Another car left the lot. There weren’t any students left that I could see, just a few cars sitting idly.

  “Really?” His face broke out in a crooked, almost toothless smile. I tried not to cringe at his poor dental health, and focus on the fact that he appeared genuinely happy with my answer. No matter what Mom said it was clear that he did care about me. He came all the way here just to apologize.

  “Yes,” I answered. My phone vibrated in my pocket, but I ignored it.

  “Do you think…I mean…can I see you again sometime?”

  “Of course.” I smiled. “Any time.”

  “Great.” Another toothless grin. “I have to go, but I’ll be back.”

  Panic gripped me when he turned to leave. “When?”

  He glanced over his shoulder. “Next week.”

  It wasn’t exactly the answer I wanted, but it would do. A week wasn’t that long. I watched him walk to the opposite side of the parking lot where an old battered pick-up sat. As he approached it, a man jumped out of the passenger side and rushed to meet him. My stomach twisted. Who was he and why was he waiting for my dad? They engaged in what looked like a heated exchange and then they both got in the pick-up. But not before the strange man glanced over and saw me watching. There was something oddly familiar about him and it caused goosebumps to break out all over my arm. Shivering, I got in my car and drove away.

  There was no trace of my dad the next two weeks. Every day after school I hoped he would show up to meet me. I even took extra time getting to my car, hoping.

  Waiting.

  Praying.

  However, the days droned on and still no sign of him. To make matters worse, Tanner still wasn’t speaking to me and I hadn’t heard from Isaac. Thank goodness Haley and I were friends again. I couldn’t imagine going through this without my best friend. Remembering how awful it was when Ian turned her against me made my stomach churn.

  On the last day before break I prayed extra hard that my dad would show. If he didn’t, I knew I wouldn’t see him for two whole weeks. He said himself that he wouldn’t show up at my house. I held out a glimmer of hope that he’d chance it while Mom was at work. However, I doubted it.

  I sat in my car until almost every other vehicle had left the lot. Still the pick-up never came. I scoured the area, chewing my bottom lip anxiously. It was quiet except for the sound of the wind howling and kicking up the leaves, causing them to scuttle like insects on the ground. Clouds framed the sky blanketing it in darkness, even though it was only afternoon. My heart broke a little every minute. What if Mom was right? What if he never came back?

  Feeling like an idiot, I dropped my head and rested it on the steering wheel. Why had I trusted him? After years of ignoring me he showed up out of nowhere and then made promises to me, and I just bought them hook, line and sinker?

  How gullible was I?

  I groaned. Tears welled up in my eyes.

  No one wants you. You’re all alone. An icy chill feathered over my skin. My scars burned. I longed for a razor to relieve the pain.

  A knock on my window startled me. I snapped my head up and saw Tanner peeking into the car. He looked me over, his brows furrowed. I furiously wiped the tears from my cheeks and rolled down the window.
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br />   Attempting to look as nonchalant as possible, I said, “Yes? Can I help you?”

  “Are you okay?” His voice was soft and gentle. It almost broke me. Then I remembered the awful words he said to me the last time we spoke. No way would I give him the opportunity to hurt me again.

  “Fine. Not like you care.” Without giving him another glance, I rolled up my window and started the car. Just before I drove away I threw him one last glance. He stood alone in the parking lot watching me. His face wasn’t angry. In fact, he looked concerned and kind.

  He looked like the same Tanner I’d fallen for.

  It almost made me turn around. But I couldn’t do it. Not again. I kept my head facing forward and sped away.

  Chapter Nine

  “Where have you been?” Mom demanded the minute I walked in the door.

  I shrugged and threw my backpack on the ground. Irritation rose in me. She wasn’t supposed to be home. Her presence had thwarted my plan to ease my pain. No way could I cut now. The verse my pastor shared a couple of weeks ago about God giving us a way out of temptation ran unexpectedly through my mind. Maybe this was His way of helping me.

  “School got out almost an hour ago.” Her eyes were glassy. Fear etched her face. She had been so worried since Dad came back.

  “I was just talking to some friends. Geez, lighten up.” I stepped over my backpack and the pile of shoes near the front door. Weaving my way through our messy family room, I made my way into the kitchen and opened the fridge. Moldy and expired food filled the shelves. Nothing looked appetizing.

  Mom followed closely at my heels. “You didn’t answer when I called.”

  After pulling out a soda, I faced her. “Sorry. But I’m here now and I’m fine, so get over it.”

  She grabbed my arm, piercing the flesh with her dagger-like nails. Her face was mere inches from mine and the scent of hairspray was overpowering. “You’ve been with him, haven’t you?”

  “Who?” I tried to break free from her grasp but she latched on tighter. The soda can was cold against my palm.